Category / Approval Addiction

by tracycpoetry

Warning Sign Haiku #2

If you’re in a conversation that’s making you doubt your own knowledge, experience, and perhaps even your sanity – put a #stop to it!

If perceptions of reality don’t align and it’s just a circular battle that has you spinning – that’s #toxic so put a #stop to it!

In a healthy relationship, agreeing to disagree and coming to the most beneficial resolution for all will be the result of stepping back and gaining perspective. You both understand that relationship is more valuable than being right.

But if the other in the relationship just wants to keep pouring oil on the flame of their fight to be right or they punish you with long silence after heartfelt apology has been offered, you may have to make the difficult decision to walk away (or to not fight to get them back or obsess about the loss after they walk away).

Either way, #crazymaking is too toxic to allow in friendships, family, work, or any environment.

Stay sane, my friends. Even if the steps to sanity sometimes cause pain.

by tracycpoetry

A Simple Haiku

Obviously….

By the number of words on this website, I use a lot of them. I love words.

Words are such a beautiful tool for connecting and communicating.

But sometimes…. words fall on unhearing ears sifted through filters of fear. And it is time to simply stop the talk and let go.

I found a spot yesterday where so much was expressed and released in silence.

And I find it only took the 17 simple syllables of a Haiku to sum it up:

Day moon 
stamped sky

Quiet creek
by the road

Heart flies free
as I let go
by tracycpoetry

Peace (a poem by Tracy C.)

I don’t think
There’s such a thing as peace
In these days of
So many  promises
Of instant satisfaction 
That only bring dis- ease
 
But even still
This peace I seek
Getting up at 5
Gazing at stars
As I await sunrise
Is it a glimpse of God I seek
Or more elusive yet
A glimpse of me
 
The me that I’m
Not even sure I can define
Because too long I’ve drawn
My own reflection
With someone else’s lines
At what point did I trade
Thrive for survive
 
Perhaps this frustration
With the way I’m living
Is what will help me
Finally
Come alive

(click video below for a spoken word version of this poem)
by tracycpoetry

Lessons from the Lawn

It’s almost-but-not-quite the day Allen comes to mow our lawn. So it’s a bit of a jungle out there with clovers and other weeds vying for their place in our front yard along with the grass.

But, upon looking out the front windows, I was treated to a sight I may have missed had our lawn been perfectly manicured….

I looked out to see a whole menagerie of urban wildlife, from a mother and baby bunny to a whole variety of birds, happily playing our front yard.

It reminded me of that scene from Disney’s old Snow White film where all the furry forest creatures are keeping Snow White company as she happily sings in the woods.

I realized…. all of the weeds and tall grass were actually attracting the amazing wildlife I was enjoying. I couldn’t help but wondering if in all of our striving for perfection, we miss – or even destroy – the beauty around us.

That is one reason I’ve titled this blog (and future book), Ragamuffin Oasis. Perhaps the true places of oasis (rest, refreshing, and thriving) are not the well manicured facades that consumerism and even religion tell us we need.

Perhaps only in admitting we are human and embracing are scruffier, imperfect, ragamuffin selves can we every be truly free.

by tracycpoetry

Refuse to be an “Edith” to someone else’s “Archie”.

All in The Family may have been a humorous show. But, in real life, Archie and Edith dynamics – whether in relationships or in culture – are anything but funny.

When I do or say something that causes hurt or harm – I will be quick to apologize. But I will NOT apologize for your words, actions, or choices.

I will be kind and compassionate but not in such a way that it enables you to be thoughtless, cruel – verbally abusive even – with no consequences.

Though I long for peace – I won’t fake peace or ignore or, worse yet, smooth over and soften cruel bigotry of others.

My codependent and enabling days are done. I refuse to be an “Edith” to someone else’s “Archie”.

by tracycpoetry

Would you rather???

So, as I was trying to decided between more gym time and God time or more mirror and makeup time this morning, Maker whispered this “Would you rather” question to my spirit:

“Would you rather hide your flaws and pretend to be perfect or reveal your flaws and be perfected?”

Ouch.

In our insta-filtered culture it’s so easy to trade quickly clicked airbrushed appearances for the hard work of authentic change. But we have a choice – difficult but achievable by our Maker’s strong Spirit in us – to rise above cultural norms and admit our weaknesses, pains, and flaws instead of covering them. And, in return, Maker blesses us with HIS strength, healing, and perfection.

Maker God, may I choose this moment and the next to live in Your light – even when it exposes my flaws – rather than running for the cover of the filtered pretense that the world offers…. In Jesus Name!

“For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light!” – Ephesians‬ ‭5:8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

by tracycpoetry

My Healing Place

It’s been a year….

OK, maybe it’s been a few years or a few decades of struggles masked by smiles.

But Maker is faithful to sculpt scarred hearts surrendered to Him into resilient masterpieces.

As I prepare to close this chapter in Atlanta – I am so thankful for the healing that has happened here over the past year-and-a-half.

I am especially thankful for those my Maker has surrounded me with in this season to help the healing happen…. Just to name a few: my North Springs United Methodist Church family – especially the Celebrate Recovery group there, my incredible colleagues who became fast friends at Emory Saint Joseph’s Hospital, my warm and welcoming neighbors here on The Hill ATL, and Hector Pereles at New Living Counseling…. Not to mention the faithful friends and family who have covered me with encouragement and prayers from across the country.

I am so very grateful and more adamant than ever when I say “Don’t do life alone”.

I really don’t think I would have survived had I not reached out for help.

#MyStorysNotOver because it’s part of an #EternalStory. AΩ; #AlphaOmegaSemicolon #SuicidePrevention #Hope #Healing #AbuseSurvivor #CodependencyRecovery #HealingContinues #HealingCommunities